Through the Lens of a Camera

Once upon a time, people would shuffle through old photographs. This means that physical fingers would grace the tangible edges of each picture and clumsily flip to the next one. Sometimes, this process would release particles of dust–desperately struggling to remain airborne by the light of the sun. Sometimes, not. Now, we hastily scroll through pictures. Click, click, zoom, “back,” “next,” done. And that’s it. Done.

In all of this sacrilegious impetuousness, there is little hope for a sacred moment–ushered in by a faded photograph– to arrive. Instead, we initiate a hurried recklessness to get to the next one. Don’t you realize that a sacred moment is able to do something with time that nothing else can? When you give pause to something because it reminds you of a former experience, the Present and the Past are firmly shaking hands, gently embracing. They are together again, posing for another photo. Sometimes, very rarely, the Future even throws her arm around the other two and says with a smile, “I’m finally here, like you hoped I would be.” However, all of this is impossible if the Present refuses to cooperate.

The Dichotomy of Doubt

There are chiefly two kinds of doubt: passive doubt and active doubt. 

The Sin of Doubt
        When the Christian passively doubts, the doubter takes comfort in all that isn't God--there is little or no praying, deep-probing, or counsel  being sought because life does not seem all that bad, even without the Giver of good. The passive doubter may occasionally glance upward--when he or she has time--but otherwise the passive doubter puts his or her schoolwork, job, friends, significant other, hobbies, and sleep in front of, or rather, in place of God.
         In fact, the passive doubter dreads having free time because he or she is forced to face this gaping void of doubt. Free time is used to clean, get ahead on work or homework, surf the internet, watch television, eat, or sleep. There may be some unresolved questions in the back of the passive doubter's mind, but these questions remain in storage unless he or she is at a church service, around Christians, or asked something faith-related. Then, suddenly, the cynical doubt surfaces when it would not have crossed his or her mind otherwise. It is more convenient to doubt, so he or she continues to doubt. One may argue that this is simply apathy, but apathy is passive doubt. This is the sin of doubt.

The Grace of Doubt
         The passive doubter need not do away with doubt, but instead convert it into active doubt. This is the road called Faith. This is the Way. There is nothing convenient about doubt for the active doubter. These unresolved questions haunt his or her mind so intensely that wrestling with these questions takes priority over everything else in the active doubter's schedule. The active doubter seeks counsel through peers, mentors, prayer, and Scripture. For the active doubter, he or she may think that doubt is an obstacle to be climbed in order to reach God, but this doubt is in fact a gift from God--grace--for God to be known. It is called doubt, but it is indeed God revealing Himself to the Christian. This is the grace of doubt.